Dating someone with a speech impediment slinkydating info
Do I hold off altogether until we hit the three-year mark in the hopes that he pops the question on his own by that point?If he doesn’t, we’ll only be a few months away from engagement season, and since I know a ring is not an insignificant purchase, I don’t really want to spring an “oh hey, I’d like to be engaged in the next 60 days” on him at that point.Which is why I would approach this in such a way that emphasizes understanding for his plight and minimizes your plight (“Jessica couldn’t believe you didn’t propose, much less during last engagement season! Once you hear how he’s feeling, you can talk about your desire to see a general pathway to marriage – without pressure or ultimatums – just so you can breathe easy and know you’re on the same page. You say he is different than the guys you dated before – how so?He will be able to respect and understand that, and, if he’s committed to you, will do everything he can to deliver. My father talks about going on a cruise to the Greek islands or the Norwegian fjords. They are funamentally anxious and fear the consequences of making a wrong decision, and so they allow inertia to dictate their lives….until someone in their lives takes the responsibility for change upon themselves. My brother will change his job when his boss fires him. In your history with him, is he the sort of guy who sees that a decision needs to be made and makes it, or is he the type of guy who complains until someone else makes a decision? If the latter, he may need you to provide more guidance. Pressure is anathema to the anxious personality because it only increases perseveration.It is certainly NOT about your friends getting engaged faster nor is it about “engagement season,” which in guy-land isn’t even a thing.Most importantly, remember this precept: Communication isn’t about finger-pointing. I understand your feelings, but honestly, in my opinion, your fears don’t outweigh your boyfriend’s fears. Your boyfriend can’t do much at all until he’s no longer miserable. You say you are living together – whose idea was that?Again, the niece is a pleasant and talented person, but her working on a project that has legalities and deliverables outside of our institution gives me pause. Or is this a mildly odd but harmless thing, since we take in volunteers anyway?I’m wary of going to HR, partially because I’d feel like a narc, and partially because our HR department is extremely useless.
But if it was just the rest of the world, I could handle it. I’ve read your recommendation that couples not get married before three years — but I couldn’t tell if that meant waiting that long to get engaged, or just not walking down the aisle until the three-year mark.I stumbled onto your blog a few years ago, after getting nowhere in my dating life, staring down the barrel at 30, and starting to get terrified that I was going to spend the rest of my life alone.I read almost all of your posts and one of your books, and while I admit I initially had trouble with some of your advice, it did make a certain amount of success if I was honest with myself. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? So, I gave your advice a try, and I’ve now been with a wonderful guy for 2.5 years, we’ve been living together for a year, and we talk about marriage and kids as something that will definitely happen eventually.Because of this, we frequently have college-age interns and the occasional volunteer.Boss started at our institution as a teen volunteer and just rose through the ranks; I believe this has been her only professional job, which is maybe why this situation is the way it is.